CAN YOU FORGIVE THE UNCLE WHO RAPED YOU?
Cleaning the Backlog of Sludge
By Pat Crosby
It happens so fast. Home from a freshman college Thanksgiving break. Upstairs in your bedroom getting primped for the big holiday family get-together. Being called down to the family dinner table. Coming down the stairs. WHAM. Uncle - father figure from earliest childhood - grabs you, pushes you against the wall, sticks his tongue down your throat. Smiles at you, and we proceed to the family dinner table where Mom, Aunt, Brother, and cousins are all waiting and smiling. Time to stuff your mouth with holiday meal.
Denial is big on the menu at family gatherings in this alcoholic family, so nothing gets said. Now or never...Never Never Land ... well not for 40 some years - if that. Maybe. In that one quick moment, trust is lost, confidence violated, self-image shattered of this young girl just setting out on the world.
Scenario Four: Prominent house-guest comes out of bedroom late at night into living room, where woman of the house is sitting alone reading a book. Something strange. He only has on a jock strap. He walks up to the woman, smiles, slithers down next to her, and slips his hands inside her nightgown and begins to fondle her. She is immobile with shock. He is a father figure, mentor, and highly regarded public personage.
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Pat Crosby
Scenario Two: Coming in with a friend from a get-together. Friend says he will escort you home. That sounds like a good safety measure late at night. You open the door of your apartment complex. In the lobby, he slams you against the wall, unzips his pants, and in about 50 seconds sprays all over you while pinning you against the wall. His mouth is pressed tight on yours, so you couldn't scream or make noise - even if you wanted to. Who would believe you if you said anything anyhow? So you bottle it up inside you... where it seeps through your self-image and memories like a toxic slow-acting poison.
All-too-common Scenario Three: Grandpa is babysitting the kids. 10 and 12 year old girls. Dad comes home early to find Grandpa lying in bed with one, unclothed, rubbing himself against your 12 year-old daughter, with her nightgown up over her head. How long has this been going on? What horror has been done to her psyche that she doesn't tell - even if asked. Don't ask - can't tell.
Who would think there was even anything to ask in this prosperous upper middle class family?
Forty years later, the hate in Dad is still palpable.... spewing out in road rage at every stop sign where other driver's don't move fast enough. Spewing out in rude disruptive behavior.
Scenario Four: Prominent house-guest comes out of bedroom late at night into living room, where woman of the house is sitting alone reading a book. Something strange. He only has on a jock strap. He walks up to the woman, smiles, slithers down next to her, and slips his hands inside her nightgown and begins to fondle her. She is immobile with shock. He is a father figure, mentor, and highly regarded public personage.
He leads her by the hand into the guest bedroom, undresses her and ejaculates all over her while she is numb and semi-paralyzed with shock. All happens so quickly before she collects her wits.
It takes time to evolve a strategy to get out of his clutches. The few friends she confides in cannot believe a man of his prominence would do such things.... so she learns to be silent.
Or be suspected and condemned in the vicious world of gossip in this religious circle for "leading him on". The level of violation of trust is incalculable.
What is the backlog of toxic sludge that has built up on the planet and in each one of us from these and other violating encounters of the closest kind? All the toxic sludge is not in the ocean.
How do individuals deal with the warped and corrupted emotions and memories that stick like tar balls onto the surface of our soul - polluting our self-image, ideas, and spilling over into our actions? Poisoning our words, memories, energy.
How do individuals deal with the warped and corrupted emotions and memories that stick like tar balls onto the surface of our soul - polluting our self-image, ideas, and spilling over into our actions? Poisoning our words, memories, energy.
In my travels throughout the world, I have often been guided to special places of mystery, where communication of a higher kind is easier. At one such place in Peru, I was shown a short and quick breathing and visualization that can help to release and dissolve the old stains on our souls, hearts and minds and memory banks. Some wonderful ethereal beings showed me this and I want to share it with you.
I have called these beings "Angels" for want of a better description.
Here is a little breathing and imaging exercise to help release old memories that you do not want to have anymore.
Simply imagine a cloud of golden particles over your head. As you breathe in, imagine the golden cloud entering into the top of your head. Imagine, feel, see, or simply wish for the golden particles to come into the top of your head.... like shimmering golden dust.
In the next few breaths, imagine the golden particles sliding down inside you.... first to the forehead, then the neck, then inside the chest, and then into your heart. Finally, let the golden particles flow all around inside you.
Breathe like this several rounds of breath. You can breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.
Ask these etheric beings of light - whom I have dubbed "The Angels of ForGIVEness" - to help you release and be freed from the old memories and thought patterns - the impressions and dents of old actions that were violations of personal sanctity.
Be making this request, you give permission for these higher power beings to literally pull the energetic threads out of you. - literally untying you from the chains of imprisonment within your psyche.
You can do this quick and easy imaging as often as you like.
I do - at stoplights, while driving when someone cuts me off, while memories arise while washing dishes, taking a walk, etc.
This simple and quick meditation does not excuse or justify the outrageous and inappropriate violations of others. It DOES allow you to clean the toxic sludge out of your mind, body, spirit, and energy, so that you can move forward freed of all that old gunk.
Older and wiser, as we like to say.
A free audio of this breathing exercise is available on the website
The booklet form of this exercise can be downloaded at
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HAPPY NEWS: The 2nd printing of the NEW Expanded 2nd Editiion of
"The little Book of ForGIVEness - 7 Easy Steps" is already completly subscribed and sold out.
"The little Book of ForGIVEness - 7 Easy Steps" is already completly subscribed and sold out.
Many thanks to our generous golden-hearted donors for funding these 2 printings.
Updated list of sponsors can be seen at
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Currently we have new requests for 2500 copies of "The little Book of ForGIVEness"
Please be an Angel and help us pay for these printings to spread ForGIVEness.
Any and all donations are most welcome and will be applied immediately to our next printing.
Your name, or the name of a loved one, will be honored in the book and on our website.
Your name, or the name of a loved one, will be honored in the book and on our website.
As our project is growing, we welcome corporate sponsorships from conscious companies.
Pat Crosby is the author of "The little Book of ForGIVEness", a mini booklet to help people clear out the toxic sludge of the past. The group Give-Away program seeks to give out 1,000,000 free copies to group and organizations this year - matching donors with group recipients.
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Pat Crosby
Founder
http://ILoveForGIVEness.com
ForGIVEness ~ Untangling and unsnarling of our own old twisted patterns, blocks and knots that keep us from moving forward into our birthright of light and love. Releasing and letting go of old past imprints and patterns that do not serve us.
ForGIVEness ~ Untangling and unsnarling of our own old twisted patterns, blocks and knots that keep us from moving forward into our birthright of light and love. Releasing and letting go of old past imprints and patterns that do not serve us.
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FORGIVENESS IS GOLDEN. THANK YOU FOR FOR-GIVING.